34 Thoughts on Loving Yourself

Its so sad that at 34, I still can't able to find reliable friends by my side.

I even tried to ask out people from church, aiming to gather new friends, but sadly they declined me😔.

Well I guess it's so obvious that people will not trust you easily.

Anyway, upon receiving this rejection, I realized the answer to love yourself.

People often advise us to "love yourself",

But

What is it to "love yourself?"

I don't get the meaning of loving yourself.

Because I want to be someone else.

I want to be popular and I hate myself for not being popular.

I wanted to be beautiful and tall, I hated that I am so small of stature.

I wanted to be talented, I hated myself for not to knowing any kind of arts like music,dance, playing instruments or whatever.

I hated myself for being average.

No trace of loving myself, whatsoever.

Once I receive a rejection from the people I want to be friends with, I somehow realize that, 

It's not impossible that out of a limelight surrounded by beautiful people, someone will notice a simple and average girl from the side.

It made me realize that, I don't have to covet the things I don't have (like being tall, popular, beautiful).

It's ok to be average. I can love myself being an 'average person'.

I don't have to compete with tall people, funny people, smart people.

I am at my best when I am just an expectator, listening and sometimes being quiet.

I feel best, when I don't impersonate someone else. I feel best, not trying so hard.

I am at peace and I love that.

That is how it hit me "how to love myself"

That is it for now for another online date blog😊.

Thanks for reading all the way.